Ms. British A. Robinson
Good morning! President von Arx, Board of Trustees, Archbishop Migliore, distinguished guests, faculty, administrators, students, parents and friends, thank you for allowing me to share this very special day with you. I am honored to be your commencement speaker!
What a blessing it is for each of you to have had the opportunity to attend a Jesuit institution of higher learning. I know that these years at Fairfield were mostly about learning - about acquiring knowledge - but I hope that it was also a time to grow - a time to become a whole person.
I hope you discovered during these years that education is not primarily about what you draw from books, but what you draw from yourself. In fact, if you took Latin, you learned that the word "educate" means to bring forth from within.
Hopefully, in this time, you have learned who you are, what matters most, who matters most, and who is not afraid to say "yes."
Speaking of saying "yes," what was Fr. von Arx thinking when he asked me to be your commencement speaker? Why me? And, why in the world did I say "yes?"
I am clearly not the typical commencement speaker. I'm not famous, I'm not important and I'm not a well-known public figure. But that is exactly the point.
I am here today because I am a testament to how each of us, by doing simple things, without thought of reward, can have the same influence as those we consider important or powerful.
I am someone who cares about our world and our future as a people. I do not need a big stage to do what I do and make a difference in the world, yet my work has given me the opportunity to share a stage with world leaders. I have had these opportunities only because, in small ways, each day, I am trying to help create the world in which I want to live.
In my daily life, I do what I can to create a world in which people say "yes" more than they say "no." It seems in our society today, people often want to know, "What's in it for me?" before they say "yes." How about saying "yes" with no thought of what you will get in return?
Opportunities to say "yes" abound; saying "yes" can open wide your life and it can create a better, more generous world to live in. So I said "yes" to this opportunity to speak to you today - so you won't say "no" to opportunities that you think may be small, but can make a big difference in the world. Today is a day when you can begin to decide what sort of world you want to live in, and to take steps, however small, to change it.
Appropriately, today is not about your commencement speaker - but about you and who you will become. Today is about how you will choose to live and what you will fall in love with. As Father Pedro Arrupe, former Superior General of the Society of Jesus, said:
"What you are in love with, what seizes your imagination, will affect everything. It will decide what will get you out of bed in the morning, what you will do with your evenings, how you will spend your weekends, what you read, who you know, what breaks your heart, and what amazes you with joy and gratitude."
Fall in love, stay in love and it will decide everything - today is the beginning of becoming the person you are and falling in love with that person during the journey called LIFE.
I believe that one's prominence and profile does not necessarily determine the effect or influence you have on society, or what the possibilities are for you and your life. The most important work gets done right in front of you each and every day; the most important people in your lives are also right in front of you; pay attention. Pay attention to your inner voice, a feeling, a sixth-sense; it is your inner compass and it will always guide you to what you love.
I am not here to tell you to change the world, to give to the poor (although that would be nice), to feel guilty if you become wealthy, to join the Jesuit Volunteer Corps or the Peace Corps (this would be very cool), to backpack around Europe or go on an African Safari - there are enough people telling you all of this already.
Today I offer my story and share with you three pivotal moments in my life because they have taught me three important lessons that may be of use to you. These three moments helped me learn that there is no best time to do anything; the only right thing to do is that which you love; and that you don't have to be in control.
When is the best time to do things? There is never really a best time to do most things; the best time to do things is often when the moment or opportunity presents itself. Sure we must all make judgments, but if we wait too long or think too much, the "best time" will pass us by. As James Baldwin writes, "No one can possible know what is about to happen. It is happening each time, for the first time, for the only time."
So, this is your time and your opportunity to make your unique impact on the world. You must seize it. Trust yourself. Your challenge is no different than those confronted by a Churchill or a Martin Luther King. It's unique and decides the fate of YOUR life. You are the best person to make those decisions. As Goethe said, "Be bold, and mighty forces will come to your aid."
Fourteen years ago, I resigned my job at a Washington think-tank and joined the Jesuit Volunteer Corps (JVC). I lived in Mobile, Alabama and worked at Catholic Charities as a social worker. For one year, I lived on $75/month; I had eight roommates; I worked with the poorest of the poor - people who lived in abject poverty. I prayed more in one year than I probably prayed in my whole 25 years up until that point. Leaving my Washington job, making no money, having to pray with others once a week, living with people who drive you totally nuts, in what has to be the hottest city in America, where it's 110 in the shade, and there are "flying roaches" ... talk about testing one's faith! (By the way, for those of you doing JVC next year, it really is amazing ... ) Some may say that my choice was a reckless one, or a backwards step, but no step is ever backwards. You are always moving into your future. I cannot imagine my life today if I had not taken this opportunity. Taking the time to do this - however, inopportune it may have seemed - opened up opportunities for me today.
What is the right thing to do? I have considered banking, I have considered other careers. In the end - or shall I say since then - I've concluded the right thing to do is that which you have a passion for: what gives you life and what keeps you dreaming. That may sound clichéd, but think about it simply. It's your one and only life. The right thing to do is what you love - for me it is to live out my faith by working for a better world - be that the rights of refugees and immigrants, access to care and treatment for people living with HIV/AIDS in Africa, or fighting for the rights of people who do not live in safe, decent and affordable housing.
Others may have pursued prestige professions or positions of power. Yet, pursuing my own path, I found myself two years ago speaking on behalf of the Holy See at the United nations (at the invitation of Archbishop Migliore who is being honored today), where I'd been asked to simply share my thoughts on world peace. I thought, "Um ... OK." It was the occasion of the 40 th anniversary of Pacem In Terris (John XXIII encyclical re: Peace on Earth.) Sure, it was an opportunity to meet and greet world leaders, but how often does the ordinary person get the chance to offer advice to those whose decisions, quite literally, could change the future of our world. Speaking at the UN was proof positive that being true to your vocation has its rewards. A 10-minute speech can make a difference - at least, I like to think so.
Finally, you can't always be in control. Although we all like to be in control of our environment and our destiny, we can't. The most basic facts about our existence – that you live and you die - tell you that you aren't. My life has underscored that circumstances and events beyond my control will happen, and happen often; this I can guarantee.
On April 19, 2005, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Based on tentative test results, my doctor was certain I had breast cancer. What, how can this be? Two days later, I underwent a biopsy procedure. This was a Thursday, which meant I would have to wait all weekend for the results. For 72 hours, my life was turned upside down; it was 72 hours of flash-forward v. flashback ... my mind was racing - what will this mean for my future? My life was over ... how would I get through this? The thoughts ranged from the utterly mundane to the serious: will I be able to wear a bathing suit? Is marriage still in my future? How long will I be out of work? And, on and on ... The questions you would ask. The questions kept coming, non-stop.
As emotions and feelings continued to swirl during these fateful days, a funny thing happened on the way to surgery: I realized that I had let go of what was about to happen to me. I was no longer in control. I could only rely on my faith and my God. I was going to have to say "YES" to cancer.
Just as soon as I began to relent, to say "yes," the outcome came - my doctor called and said, three times, ... "You don't have cancer, you don't have cancer, you don't have cancer." All three breast lumps were benign. The doctors were in shock; they had never been so wrong. 0 for 3. Simply put, they were stumped!
In an instant, I was given a new life, a second life. Nothing would ever be the same. My path and course would soon change. During the time that the diagnosis was uncertain, I had to turn down what I thought was my dream job. I had just accepted a position as a Country Director for the US Peace Corps in Namibia.
Nothing would be the same ... my dream, gone in a flash, but not for long. Six months later, the "cancer" was gone, and the opportunity to work in Africa would present itself to me again. In fact, the chance to do anything was once again possible.
I am just like you. A life in progress. I am just farther down the road than you. Looking back at where I came from, I have shared what little bits of wisdom I have gained, in the hope that it will give you confidence as you move forward. Where my steps were tentative, you can be more surefooted.
I speak today to give you more confidence in your own judgments, to help you overcome your own insecurities, or those doubts you have, "What do I know?"
But I believe what Nelson Mandela (1994 Inaugural Speech) said:
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you."
Do want you want to do. Follow your passion and you will end up where you belong. Don't worry if things get out of control, or if life throws you a curve. Make the best decisions you can, accept life as it comes, and you will be surprised: mighty forces will come to your aid.
When should you do this? Why not now?
Congratulations Class of 2006! Thank you and God bless you!
Posted On: 05-21-2006 10:05 AM
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